After
Write for five minutes without editing and then publish with no looking back.
I will try once more to do this challenge the weeks word is ‘After’.
 |
| After
After the day was over |
When we remember
So often when we loose a loved one
throughout the day we remember special things about them.
The way they walked, or laughed, or said prayers, or sang.
We remember with sadness and also with love in our heart
because of who they were and how much they meant to us.
We wish so much we could hear their voice again or look into their eyes or take them for a drive.
We remember and keep those memories close to us.
It is all a part of saying goodbye to someone we love.
I was wondering during the Easter season if the ones who loved Jesus felt the same way.
They walked with him. They shared meals with him.
They heard his laugh and his concerns, heard his prayers and experienced his power.
They knew without a shadow of a doubt he could heal or change the seas or speak demons away from ones who were tormented.
They didn’t always understand or believe him at the time but they knew
he had the potential to change things as he often did when it was necessary.
They knew and experienced who he was and I am sure
when the last week of his life came and went
like those of us who have lost a loved one
I imagine they walked the streets in shock.
How could he be with us one day and then be gone?
It is a normal question and very real and rational.
Jesus tried to warn them but they could not really understand what he was telling them.
On the day they saw the rulers take him away and beat him and then they saw him on the cross
it perhaps began to make sense but then they also saw him die.
It was over.
They had heard the women weeping at the foot of the cross.
Hope had turned into hopeless and they were left empty without a purpose.
Their grief and disbelief became a vital part of the story for them.
Many of them had left family and jobs to follow him and now they had nothing.
I am sure in the dark of the night they remembered his words.
They remembered his tenderness.
They remembered his love for them.
They could hear his voice and how he said their name.
In the quiet of the moments it is when we spend time remembering
the many things about those who we love when they leave us.
I was just wondering during the Easter season about so many things.
It’s kind of like that when we remember.
Thank you.
ON This Easter week…
I pray we can stand before the crosses and raise our hands…
IN worship.
It is because of the cross we have hope.
It is because of the cross we have peace.
It is because of the cross we have life to the fullest.
Only through the cross we have life eternal everlasting and on going.
Thank you God…
for loving us so much that you gave your only son.
A SON you loved so much…
SO that when we believe in you and Him.
We will not die forever we will have ever lasting life.
Thank you God.
John 3:16
A life remembered
On Sunday we said good bye for a final time to my husbands dad.
He was a dad to all of us.
He was 90 years and six months old exactly.
His heart was tired and it was time to go home.
It has been a journey since mom died three year ago.
She wanted the ‘children’ to take care of him and they did their best to do that and honor her wish.
He was loved by many who knew him.
He left a legacy of life and hope and compassion and most of all
a love for His God.
He met mom and married her then they had five boys and a daughter then years later they had the joy of meeting many grand children and one great grand child.
They almost made it to 61 years of marriage.
At first it was really hard for him when she left I think it made him feel kind of lost and even a little alone.
They were together on many levels and it was a difficult change for him when she passed.
We said good bye for a final time here on earth but we know that someday we will hear him say.
“what took you so long I have been waiting for you”.
Dad O you were loved and respected and we will always remember you and miss the times we spent with you.
You are finally together in a wonderful reunion …
on palm Sunday 2013.
Breath
I have given birth to two children.
In each experience there was stretching and churning and contracting and breathing.
It was all a part of bringing life to these children.
It is the preparing of the body for the passing of newness from the inside to the out.
It is hour by hour and then minute to minute.
For some it is a long wait, for others it comes quickly.
I have also been in the presence of two people dying.
The same happens when one is leaving from this world to the next.
Each movement of stretching and churning important to the final moments of passing away.
The process is not too different than the process of birth.
Each agonizing hour passes as one hopes and prays for the final end.
Life comes after the breathing and the pushing takes place and
the words form from physicians lips, “you are ready to deliver”.
Death is the same process.
Death comes with contractions and breathing in and out as the body tires of the process and gives up and the love one is told,
“you can go home now”.
The beginning and the end are opposite forces with different results.
The journey into life and the journey out of it is the same.
The lungs expand as life is pushed towards us.
The lungs expand as life is removed from us.
Breath is all a part of it.
When one is pronounced alive the breath is checked and the vitals are recorded
and the words are spoken,”life is here”.
When one is pronounced dead the breath is monitored and the vitals are recorded
and the words are spoken, “it is over”.
It is all about the breath.
The inhaling and the exhaling saturating the lungs causing them to expand as they pour oxygen into the one arriving.
The process of dying is the opposite.
It is the shutting down and the slowing of one laboring to leave.
We watch for color in the skin and signs of change.
It is all about the breath.
Expectant mom’s are instructed to breathe through the contractions so the pain is minimized.
The dying one does the same.
The body knows and the anticipation and anxiety of leaving is minimized with medication.
One is told to work hard and push it through.
One is calmed and kept comfortable as the end nears for the one passing.
Each journey is so similar yet so very different.
Life and death.
It is all about the breath.
A boy and a dog
At one point in time we had an old black dog named Samson and a grandson named Samuel.
One day when they were goofing around grandpa said in a very firm tone, “Sam sit down”.
And they both did.
From that moment on Samuel stayed the same and the dog was named Old black dog. (Obd)
It is just a sweet memory from a grandpa and grandma’s point of view.
A boy and a dog… spending some time together.
This last summer our old black dog went to doggie heaven.
He lived a good long life and he was happy and loved.
He was a pound dog and he knew he was rescued.
Joining Diedra on jumping tandem with the Sunday community.
A daughter was born
Thirty five years ago God blessed us with a precious new baby girl.
We were amazed at her round head of dark hair and olive skin.
She surprised us as we had gone to a birthday party that evening and the tightness and mild contractions were not really unusual for me.
Waking up in the middle of the night I remember asking the question,
“Are these supposed to be every few minutes?”
We both realized this must be labor.
We also knew she was head up and bottom down as I had just gone to the doctor that day and had the ultrasound picture to prove it.
We waited for grandma to come be with our son and I remember saying, “We will be back soon it is too early by a few weeks”.
We arrived at the hospital and they noticed how far the labor had progressed.
The doctors were surprised when we told them our son was born in two hours it seemed to create a concern for them.
Rushing me to surgery with a breech birth was a scare to us.
The contractions had done their job and I was ready to deliver in the elevator.
As young parents we had no clue what to expect in a surgery room and we were not anticipating the anxious doctors rushing to get this little one out.
When they held her tiny body up for us to see we both cried with joy.
A baby girl was born.
We had a son and now a daughter.
Sarah (princess) Kathleen (dear to my heart) was the name chosen.
Thirty five years later she is a beautiful woman and a wonderful mom.
Our daughter was born.
We love you Sarah and always pray for you and your three daughters.
We have enjoyed watching you grow and mature and
become the woman you are today.
You are strong, confident and you will always be dear to our hearts.
When you look in the mirror always remember you are beautiful and you are loved.
A challenge
The words Rest brings many things to me.
I think of flannel pants and warm shirts.
I think of warm blankets and pajamas.
I think of sleeping in when everything in you yells get up.
I think of taking a weekend a way and driving to the beach.
Listening to the water crash against the sandy beaches.
I think of slowing down.
I think of being still.
My word of the year has been quiet and I do feel rest can walk alongside that word.
Be still. Be quiet. Be calm. Rest in the situation and listen instead of talk.
So much is yelling at us and clamoring for our attention.
Find rest for your soul then you can be restored and renewed and
able to give again.
Rest… Restore, energize, still, trust
Restore
Energize
Still
Trust
All equal REST.
End.
Three generations
To our son, Christopher.
Today is your birthday.
Thirty eight years ago at 5:29 pm we became first time parents.
We were young.
We were not sure what we were doing.
We learned as we faced the life changes a little baby can create
and we adapted to our new normal.
Our home at the time was a tiny three room cottage that included a small bathroom with a claw foot bathtub and your bedroom was
a crib length wide and two crib lengths long.
It was our beginning.
The start of our family.
That was many years ago and we have seen many changes since then.
You grew up and left high school and then headed to college where you met and you married your college sweetheart.
It has been a thrill and a blessing to meet your three sons.
As the generations continue we remain amazed and thankful at God’s faithfulness and beauty.
Happy Birthday son.
It has been great to watch you become the man you are today.
Always remember you have our prayers and our love.
A question for you
Speaking of heart issues following up on my last writing.
It leads me to the wondering of ‘how is your heart condition?’
After the stress test I was to meet with the cardiologist for the reading of the results.
Not anticipating any bad news I went into his office with a hope that all was good.
Although it did leave me with an uncertain feeling since the test was ordered and in my health history there has been high blood pressure and cholesterol issues.
I did wonder what would it feel like to have him tell me,
“your heart has major issues”.
All of us have heart issues to a point if we are human.
We have lack of forgiveness sometimes.
We have broken relationships and bitterness sometimes.
We have deep grief sometimes.
We have wounded spirits sometimes.
Each of these have the potential to create ‘heart issues for us’.
Years ago when I went through a serious depression my heart ached and it felt very dark and heavy.
Heart issues can mask themselves and unless one goes to a physician who can diagnose the problem
they have the potential to shorten life expectancy.
As I sat across the room with the cardiologist he said to me in a very serious tone,
“Why are you in here?”
My heart was fine according to everything he saw on the readings
in fact he even went so far as to say the test wasn’t even needed and
he hoped it didn’t come out of my pocket.
It is good to hear the confirmation from a specialist just as it is good to hear from the Holy Spirit that our heart is in good shape if we are believers.
We don’t know the condition of our heart until we make the effort to find out.
The doctor proceeded to talk to me about diet and supplements giving me the permission to begin an exercise program that would not only strengthen my heart but give more years to my life.
He said for me to start at thirty minutes a day and work up to a weight loss of ten to fifteen pounds.
Just as we need the Holy Spirit to share with us and reveal to us ‘the condition of our heart’
this doctor needed to confirm for me the realization that I was fine and ready to exercise.
So how are you feeling these days about the condition of your own heart?
Is there something that needs to be fixed or changed or addressed emotionally?
I think it is something for all of us to think about.
One Word 2018 Simplify/2019 Simplify/2020 Rest, 2021/Comfort
Simplicity
my 2017 picture
Philipians 4:13
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow."
Courage is not the absence of fear but it's taking action in the midst of it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Below you will find a few of my favorite websites or blogs. They have given me encouragement and challenged me on this journey.
This image of a bleeding heart represents a journey of healing from brokenness to wholeness.
Some of my favorite books:
One thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp
Chasing Silouettes ~ Emily Weirenga (http://www.emilywierenga.com/)
Hinds feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard
http:/www.brokennessintobeauty.com/
Welcome
The vision for this is to challenge the reader into a new and different way of thinking.
I appreciate and always value your comments.
Having others walk alongside
and join in the sharing is part of the process.
As we get encouraged ~ Lord help us to encourage others.
"And the day came when the risk to remain a tight bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." Anais Nin
my blog buttonThe crosses are found on a beach at Winema Christian Camp on the Oregon coast.. a place to relax and find God in the process. My favorite place ....to rest and restore my spirit.
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