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Twenty years ago our lives were changed

 

Twenty years ago our lives were changed and a sweet baby entered our lives. It was our first grand daughter’s birth day. Her due date was in July so she surprised us with an early arrival and after a few ‘scary moments’ she was delivered weighing only two pounds eleven ounces and seventeen inches long.
Her eyes were intense, she was alert and ever so tiny.
I was in shock to know that on this day I was a grandma. Something that was dreamed about often but never realized in real time, until this day.
She was in NICU until she grew stronger and more able to eat and survive out of the setting.
When she was a few weeks old they let her go home weighing only three pounds, nine ounces. She had to be carefully placed in the car seat with extra blankets around her.
NICU is a special place for those tiny ones who cannot go home yet.
Trained nurses work hard to keep them comfortable and safe. It is considered a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit.
There are levels of care the babies get depending on the severe conditions they were born with, she only had IV on her head and monitors on her heart, she was not hooked up very much.
She was tube fed a few times then she was able to use a bottle. Her spunk kept her fighting and she was alert and healthy always.
For that we were very blessed and happy.
I always dreamed of being a grandma and she was such a blessing to us, when her mom (our daughter) had to go back to work I quit my job and stayed home with this very tiny baby.
It was a joy and a privilege to be with her every day and help nurture her and grow. It was very healing to me.
It’s hard for me to believe she is twenty and a beautiful grown woman now; we feel so blessed to be her grand parents.
Her name is Faith Elizabeth. Our lives were changed forever because of her presence.

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It’s more fun to talk with someone

“It’s more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like, “what about lunch?” (AA Milne)
I saw this quote and although I am not sure it really came from the writer of Winnie the pooh stories, I like the concept, to keep things simple.
We have all met someone at some point in our lives; who try to convince you that they are more for show than for real honest relationship. They use lofty words, or random concepts that don’t make sense at first.
I don’t choose to connect with those kind of people. I generally have no problem reading body language or non verbal ques but sometimes it is hard even for me to figure it out.
I love honest people. You don’t have to guess where they stand or believe; it is just there in front of them. Church is a place where we sometimes pretend to have our ‘ducks in a row’; when really they are running every direction and we can’t ask for help. I would rather have someone ask for help and be direct with me, then make me guess. Guessing takes so much energy.
I love to go out for lunch with a good friend, where we can make the quality time for each other sharing matters of the heart. I have one friend when we would meet for breakfast sometimes we would still be there for lunch in the same booth. Good sharing. It’s more fun sharing with someone who listens to you, truly listens and gives their thoughts and opinions in love back to you.
Friendship. A gift we give to ourselves.

To all the mothers out there

To all the mothers out there I wish you a day of relaxation and rest.
To those women who wish for and long for and pray for every single month to be able to be called a mom.
I send you a hug, a prayer and a kind word. I understand it is a void and this holiday is especially hard.
Many can be very insensitive to you and I am sorry if I have ever been in that ‘role’.
To those who have been mom’s but for some reason your children are no longer living, it doesn’t make you a less mom; it just makes it more hard.
To those who have lost their moms; this is a hard day full of memories and tears.
I remember often times in church a Pastor would say, “to all the mom’s please stand up.”
What about those who have lost babies they never have seen? What about moms who have no story to share or picture on their phone to show off?
They are still moms who have lost a part of their heart.
I pray we be more sensitive to all those who are moms and daughters.
My own mother was not a warm fuzzy type of mom; so often I would find myself standing at the card aisle and wondering what should I purchase?
Sometimes in my journey I wished for a section just for us who were in therapy.
The ‘I don’t know what I should buy because nothing really fits’ group.
Years ago I would just settle on a generic ‘have a nice day’ with a little pansy on it and call it done.
You can’t go wrong with a pansy and it doesn’t require a lot of ‘thinking’ or planning.
I don’t have anyone to shop for now, my grandma’s are gone and our mothers are gone too.
So to all the women out there, I wish for you a peaceful day and a day for just resting.
Whether you are a mom, grandma, sister or cousin. This wish is for you.

I won’t believe it unless I see the nail wounds

“I won’t believe it unless I see the nail wounds in his hands, put my fingers into them, and place my hand into the wound in his side.” John 20:24-29
One of the twelve disciples, Thomas was not with the others when Jesus came. (Jesus had visited them in the upper room behind locked doors.)
They had told him, “we have seen the Lord!” (But he replied I want to see, feel and experience it myself. My paraphrase.)
Eight days later the disciples were together again, and this time Thomas was with them.
The doors were locked; but suddenly, as before, Jesus was standing among them.
“Peace be with you,” he said. Then he said to Thomas, “Put your finger here, and look at my hands. Put your hand into the wound in my side. Don’t be faithless any longer. Believe!”
“My Lord and my God!” Thomas exclaimed. Then Jesus told him, “You believe because you have seen me. Blessed are those who believe without seeing me.”
I remembered this story and realized the Friday’s word prompt was the word touch.
Thomas had to touch Jesus so that he would truly believe in the resurrection and the final story. I often have wondered how Jesus knew just exactly what Thomas needed.
He didn’t ask him; HE just KNEW what Thomas would need in order for him to believe.
I find that fascinating and wonderful that He knew how to approach Thomas and how to create the scene for him to believe.
Thomas wasn’t being a bully or a problem he just needed facts in order for him to really believe.
I don’t really blame him; if he actually saw him crucified and treated horribly. Wouldn’t we all say that?
“Let me see for myself.” Jesus approached Thomas in a way that only Jesus could.
Here is the proof, feel them and believe.
This is a good lesson for us all. We don’t often have to say what we ‘need’; in order for Jesus to know in our heart what we need.
I love this ‘touching part’ of the story, it just makes it more real for us to understand the heart of Thomas.

I understand the familiar story

I understand the familiar story and experience of those who loved Jesus; although they didn’t fully recognize him.
The other day we were in Costco a big retail store standing in line to pay for our ‘purchases’.
An older man behind us asked about my husbands coat, it had an emblem on it from a Christian camp where we both work and enjoy.
The man said to us, “are you believers?” we said, “Yes we work at a camp at the beach.”
Then we continued to talk to this man. Elderly cute little fellow and as we shared for some reason; he gave me his name on a card.
I realized it was a name of a man who used to be our Pastor over thirty years ago.
As he talked and as we shared, the moment ‘of burning in my heart just like those men on the road with Jesus, took place.’
The more he spoke to us… the more I tuned into his voice and really listened. I became very aware of the fact that we knew him.
I recognized him and told him HE used to be our Pastor. Now I had to really tune in to his voice since he was much older and looked a bit different.
But the realization it was him; brought us great joy. HE hugged us, we prayed right there in the middle of Costco.
He was now in his eighties and was quite the ‘elderly’ little fellow.
I was thrilled to see him again and as I did; I remembered how he was a mighty man of God and pastor teacher to the church.
Jesus often taught about; “My sheep will know my voice.”
I don’t think our voices ever change. I knew this was our Pastor because I tuned into his words and heard what he said with my heart.
It was an amazing moment and one I won’t soon forget.
I heard him and I saw with my own eyes, a little gentleman who we once loved. It was a wonderful moment for us all.
Our Pastor Jack said to us, “you are going to make me cry.” It was a lovely meeting and prayer time and a familiar time of sharing.