by Sharon O | Sep 13, 2017 | Uncategorized
When we are talking about moving forward with intention it brings to us a stirring.
The first question that might stir feelings around our ‘plans’ of getting organized; is discovering the ‘why’ you want to change.
Change always requires effort and a stepping forward in a new direction.
Knowing the ‘why’ behind the movement is critical to your success.
It is really helpful when we can either write it down or verbally say out loud.
The reason I want to organize is: to get rid of clutter and simplify my living space.
That is our ‘why’.
We make this a new goal and we focus on change and new agenda’s.
In order for me to feel motivated I have to see progress, I have to know visually I can do this by myself and feel empowered because I did it.
The other question to ask is who is the battle for? if you are married is it a mutual goal?
If you are single is it to be on track better and more efficiently?
Someone said this week in order to accomplish anything well, we have to dig deep within ourselves to find our purpose and peace.
If we are struggling with this process of moving forward with intention, ask ‘why’.
The struggle is real, and has a sabotaging power so we must stop if this happens and regroup our intention and our focus.
It is ok to give yourself permission to take a break before returning to the tasks.
When we so return to our process of intentional cleaning we will know what gets us frustrated and what takes our mind off of the intended goal.
Motivation to change and do better is an inside job, it is not just ‘cleaning a room’.
It is allowing yourself a new day to breathe better.
It is a focusing on a new day for simpler living.
Simplicity is clearing space in our heads and in our homes for positive energy and hope.
Are we ready to move forward with a purpose?
Let’s encourage each other as we do this together.
by Sharon O | Sep 9, 2017 | Uncategorized
The idea of moving forward with intention came to me a few weeks ago.
When I plan on a task I set aside three days to really tackle it. That is my emotional limit.
If it’s a painting job, it’s done in a short time frame. I tire easily of the task and want it done.
I think it is good to have intention for many things in our lives.
Intention is: mentally determining an action or result.
The last few days I have been cleaning our master bedroom.
I started at the bathroom counter then moved to each corner of the room, removing items not needed anymore.
My personal dresser was cleaned out and I am purging old socks, and other items that have no purpose.
Really does one person need three dresser drawers of socks?
With the intention of thinking, what do I like, what is comfortable and what is the most recent purchase.
I managed to put in a bag so far over 40 pair of socks to give away. Someone might like them.
There will be more to give away and repurpose. I am intentionally ready to let go and release this stuff.
It is a good and peaceful feeling knowing that it doesn’t need to take up space.
Because my nature is to be a sentimental messy there are many items of ‘old’ memories that need to be gone through and figured out what is important and what is not.
This is a project for one person. We grow stronger when we are making the decisions for ourselves.
Moving forward with intention is a great plan for a fall season.
It takes planning and determination to not get distracted or discouraged.
Vacuuming is not fun but necessary. Dusting just the same, not exciting but we have to do it.
Personal intentions are just the same; any program or new direction is sometimes boring but in the end very positive. Once we determine the goal and intention of what is to be accomplished the rest is pretty easy.
Are there ways you can move forward with a better intention for yourself?
Let’s make this a new challenge.
by Sharon O | Sep 7, 2017 | Uncategorized
We have gone through the many ways of letting go, the emotional process of cleaning and purging.
We have journeyed through the hard parts of life and loss and found hope in the middle of it all.
We have ventured into new schedules and new ideas and plans both individually and as a couple.
This fall I have seen many face book pictures of mom’s taking pictures of children moving up into new grades.
They are facing new schedules and new situations too.
Some are entering school as a college age person, some are entering into kindergarten for the first time.
All ages bring us new awareness that life is a series of changes and choices.
In the past week there was a horrendous fire in our area started by a young teen who didn’t make good choices.
The lesson learned will be with him for his entire life.
When we see something like this we begin to understand that no choice we make impacts only ourselves.
If we have family and friends each decision made effects all of us.
How busy we become or how preoccupied we allow ourselves to be affects our peace.
For me there must be time of slow introspective moments of quiet and rest.
Not sleeping just restful restoration.
Fall is here and there is a short window of time till Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Always time for family, always time for reflection and memory making.
I am going to try some new schedules for writing, for exercise and for personal relationships.
The lessons learned in letting go of what is not necessary will be life changing.
Will you join with me in this challenge?
If we allow the ‘clutter’ to remain around us both physically and mentally we become weighted down,
with what is not positive or needed in this time of our lives.
It is a challenge I will take on with all the energy I can hold onto.
Our lessons learned are good and become our teachers if we allow them to teach us.
by Sharon O | Sep 4, 2017 | Uncategorized
One day while I was sitting in the therapy office; my counselor gave me a little bottle someone had made.
There was a little hand written note on it that said, “for someone.”
Then she quoted the verse about God noticing and saving our tears in a bottle.
[You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle.
You have recorded each one in your book.] Psalm 56:8
I thought it was very sweet and powerful that she would make something for someone she didn’t know.
It also had an impact on me since all the years in therapy I never cried, came really close a few times.
Growing up it was a ‘known lesson’ that showing feelings or especially tears was not a safe thing.
Often I would cry in my bed quietly but no one would know.
So when I think that God was with me when each tear fell, it is comforting to know I was not alone.
The process of letting go of old rules or lessons has been freeing.
To experience sorrow in a normal way. To accept it and know that it is ok to feel the feelings.
To say what you feel without hurting someone gives value to your voice.
I remember when it would be a struggle during counseling to say the words.
I would hear him reminding me in a very quiet voice, “I am here listening.”
Another part of letting go is the process of cleaning.
Letting go of things that used to be ‘important’.
It is in the letting go when we learn to release the grip either it had on us or we had on it.
Another step of this journey is going through closets, ‘keepsake’ things that have less meaning now.
It’s taking a big risk for me as I am definitely a sentimental messy.
I love cards from people and keep them, I treasure children’s drawings and save them.
There will be a point in time when I must let go.
Release and purge the ‘stuff’ now when I am mentally in a place to do it.
Just as I had to let go of childhood pain and move on into freedom and healing.
I have to move forward and get rid of the ‘mess’ because it doesn’t have to be part of the message anymore.
My story is still here.
I just don’t have to keep the years of journaling, the pages of words that could do more harm then be helpful or healing to anyone but me.
The process of letting go is releasing the grief. Understanding it’s power and then learning to breathe again.
I saw a quote from Brene’ Brown and I wanted to share it:
“It takes courage to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart.”
The process of letting go is being able to tell the story as it was and then move on.
That was then, this is now, and I like who I am becoming.
by Sharon O | Sep 1, 2017 | Uncategorized
[“Come to me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest for your souls.”] Matthew 11:28
[“You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.”] Psalm 56:8
Have you ever been in a place in your life where a deep heaviness followed you around and the sense of sorrow was real and not able to shake off no matter what you did?
Yeah me too.
In those times I have to remind myself that within the process of grief there is a learning to let go.
A few years ago my husband and I experienced a series of deaths of people of both family and friends.
We lost my parents within a year of each other, we lost our spiritual ‘parents’ within the same time frame, in the same time frame we lost an old cat and then an old dog, then our other good friends were killed in a horrible crash, then another good friend died of cancer.
A few years before that we lost my husbands parents too.
It was a lot of grief to process on many different levels.
When you think of grief and letting go it’s hard. It impacts you deeply.
You lose a part of your life story.
When I think of those who passed away sometimes memories fade.
The power of the story changes when those we cared for are gone.
In the process of saying good bye there comes a realization that in this life, we never will see that person again.
If we are believers we know we will, but we miss them in the here and now time.
In my last counseling session before I did closure on that too, he said to me, “do you realize how much loss you have had in less than four years?” It was hard to think of each passing as a loss.
Each one held different places in our hearts and each impacted us deeply, even the animals.
My parents ‘closure’ was a hard one for me as each of them had a different story and impact on my life.
I did not let go of the ‘story’ but I did let go of the pain that surrounded it.
To disregard the ‘chapters’ that affected my life would be wrong, but I don’t have to dwell on them or stay seated in that place emotionally.
The other hard closure was letting my counselor go.
He was the one person who really knew me and understood how my emotional ‘world worked’.
But in saying that I knew it was time to say goodbye.
I was in his office for many years and the tools he had taught me to find safety in my feelings worked within the context of trauma and death. I was stronger and more able to handle the crisis without him.
Did I feel sad when I drove away? oh yes. Did I want to go back into the room ‘just one more time?’
Oh yes. But the one thing he always told me, it was his job to work himself out of a job.
Learning to let go is just another way of saying, that this time in my life will always have deep meaning to me and I will never forget the moments treasured in memory about them.
Is there something in your life, or someone that you are learning to let go?
Grief and letting go is a process we all must grow through at some point in time.
The main thing I learned in therapy was, the only way out is through
