by Sharon O | Mar 11, 2014 | Uncategorized
The first word I shared from the basket of words was courage.
The second word I shared about was willingness.
Now the third word I am sharing about is trust.
Dictionary.com says: Trust is
Reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety of a person or thing; confidence. Confident expectation of something; hope.
A person on whom or thing on which one relies; God is my trust.
To believe. Certainty. Faith. Trust. Assurance.
These are all powerful and wonderful definitions of the word trust.
But in the real world of recovery and getting better
trust is one of the most difficult things to grasp.
The concept that one can be trusted or believed in or be assured of, is the most challenging part of the journey ahead of anyone entering this phase of life.
To know in my thought process that someone wants to help me with good motive or intention was a huge issue in the beginning.
When one comes from a difficult background depending on the degree of mistrust in all people.
It can take years to finally realize one person really cares enough to help no matter how long the journey takes for you.
When I entered in to the room of recovery I had to know in my heart and believe in my spirit
that this person was safe and would not hurt or harm me.
The first step was realizing it was a process and it would take time.
For me
a very long time.
Even though the counselor I saw was chosen by his experience and reputation in the field of recovery.
He also was the one who told me trust would be a major part of our work together.
Every time I entered into that room I had to choose to trust as I sat in my favorite chair by the door.
If the process got too uncomfortable I knew I could leave although for many reasons I never did.
I had to learn to trust in the process of allowing another to walk alongside me through the painful layers and feelings that are always a part of remembering.
Recovery is not pain free.
Just like any birthing process of bringing something new into the scene of our lives.
There is a deeply intensive road to walk before any kind of healing can take place and it must be walked slowly and not forced.
I had to trust in the process of sharing my heart hurt and then lean in to the confidence that this person really does have my best interest in mind and they will stay with me till healing takes place.
Question for you:
Is it hard to trust?
to trust God?
to trust in yourself?
to trust others who might want to help you?
to trust the path you must go on in order to become healthy?
Reliance on the integrity of the process is the hardest part of trusting no matter what kind of journey we have before us.
It is not an easy word but oh so necessary in the process of recovery.
The most difficult word in this kind of journey is to trust.
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| the first to grasp onto |
then
then
by Sharon O | Mar 9, 2014 | Uncategorized
Joining Deidra on jumping tandem and the Sunday Community
by Sharon O | Mar 7, 2014 | Uncategorized
The five minute challenge today is the word: willing
Write for five minutes and don’t edit it.
Lord I am willing to learn all that you want to teach me.
Help me to open my heart and open my spirit to the lessons you bring my way.
You know me best.
You have set me in this place in time and this direction is guided by you.
May my fears and apprehensions not cloud your will for me.
I stand feeling unqualified. Challenged. Untrained at times.
My writing is from my heart not necessarily from the editing point of view.
You have brought me this far and you will continue to guide this journey.
Help me to be a willing partner in this adventure and help me also to not doubt your good and kind motives.
I know all that you are doing within me is to stir awake the words and the stories and the chapters yet to be shared.
Thank you for being so patient.
Your love is a gift.
http://lisajobaker.com/five-minute-friday/
by Sharon O | Mar 5, 2014 | Uncategorized
The first word I shared about was courage.
The next one on the list is: willingness.
Dictionary.com said the definition is:
Willingness: Cheerfully consenting or ready.
Inclined, minded, freely or voluntary.
What I have learned in the process of therapy and recovery.
In the beginning we do not enter into it… cheerfully.
Usually we go because we have the realization in our heart that life is not peaceful inside our ‘spirits’ and we realize something must change so we can heal.
Courage is simply the willingness to be afraid and act anyway.
Robert Anthony
It takes courage to volunteer oneself into a therapy room and open your deepest wounds up to someone you just met and then begin to trust them.
It is about consenting and giving permission.
It is a knowing deep within yourself that this must take place in order for healing to begin.
What we call the secret of happiness is no more a secret than our willingness to choose life. Leo Buscaglia
Life in a new scene or setting.
Creating for us change because we are desiring something different.
We are giving permission to another person to ask questions and probe into our ‘darkest places’
in order for us to find healing and health.
I’ve never found therapy to be a sign of weakness, I found the opposite to be true.
The willingness to have a mirror held up to you definitely requires strength. Brooke Shields.
And strength and courage and willingness are all a part of therapy and recovery.
We incline ourselves to the knowing that this is very needed right now and we will not be the same when we are through with this process.
by Sharon O | Mar 2, 2014 | Uncategorized
We gain Strength and courage,
and confidence
by each experience in which
we really stop to look fear in the face…
we must do that which
we think we cannot.
Eleanor Roosevelt
We are stronger than we think we are… believe in yourself today.
Joining Deidra on jumping tandem and the Sunday community
((Oregon beach photo by Melissa))
by Sharon O | Feb 25, 2014 | Uncategorized
The first word:
Courage is not the absence of fear but it’s taking action in the midst of it.
Dictionary.com says: Courage is:
The quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, without fear. bravery.
to take ones courage in both hands to nerve oneself to perform an action.
Courage is an action word.
When I first began my journey into recovery I didn’t know what to expect and was not sure who to see or how to navigate through the unknowns.
There came a point in time when the realization came to me if I didn’t do something, nothing would take place and nothing would change the way I was feeling.
So I began to ask questions.
I searched and interviewed well known counselors.
To admit to yourself or anyone else that one needs counseling takes courage.
A lot of it.
Emotionally I knew and was convinced something had to be done.
The journey of healing with a lady counselor began the day she asked me, “why are you in here today?”
That is when you find courage and truth deep within yourself before you answer.
As time moves on you become more brave in finding your voice and
you become stronger each time you go in to talk.
“You gain strength, courage and confidence
by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face.
You are able to say to yourself, ‘I lived through this horror.
I can take the next thing that comes along.’
Eleanor Roosevelt
Courage is not an easy word but
when we finally become real with ourselves we find healing.
Courage doesn’t always roar.
Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying,
“I will try again tomorrow.”
And each time I tried and took action to heal
the tomorrows became easier and the pain lessened.
Becoming real with ourselves is a huge part of having courage.
by Sharon O | Feb 24, 2014 | Uncategorized
Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
Be acceptable in your sight,
Oh Lord, my rock and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14
The unfolding of your words give light:
It gives understanding to the simple. Psalm 119:130
Pleasant words are a honey comb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24
Therefore comfort one another with these words.
1 Thessalonians 4:18
Joining Deidra on Jumping tandem and the Sunday community.
by Sharon O | Feb 22, 2014 | Uncategorized
Years ago when I entered into a season of therapy.
I was given at some point in time a basket of words.
They are heart shaped and etched into the pottery stone.
The basket is broken.
I don’t remember if it always was that way but for me now
it represents the fragile and broken spirit I had when entering into the season of healing.
In the recovery group we were instructed to pick a word and then write about it in our journal books.
Giving voice to our ‘thoughts’ on paper so the feelings would not stay hidden deep inside ourselves.
For many survivors feelings stay hidden and silenced and the only way out of that season of silence is to move through it.
The only way out is through.
We were told that over and over.
The only way out is through.
You must move from the dark places inside to a lighter ‘healing place’ restoring your spirit and your broken wounded self inside.
A broken leg cannot heal if one keeps walking on it, there must be a time for restoration and calm.
Then after a short time of ‘healing’ physical therapy begins so the bone can learn to to accept the pressure.
Emotional healing is very much the same concept.
Restoring the broken wounded child and moving her into a strong voice of an adult.
A few nights ago in the quiet of our room I woke up with the idea of writing the words as a blog post.
Each week one word would be written and focused on.
Exploring the meaning and the thoughts surrounding that word.
A basket of words representing new life.
Peace ~ delight ~ abundance ~ healing ~ beauty ~ rest ~ humor ~ balance ~ change ~ tenderness ~ play ~ willingness ~ courage ~ compassion ~ forgiveness ~ light ~ trust ~ power ~
A basket of words representing growth and health and empowerment.
When we are broken we don’t see the potential for healing.
We only feel the brokenness deep inside ourselves.
(or we feel nothing at all)
We are not sure what to do with that internal mess so many times those who enter into this journey go in with great resistance and fear because we don’t know or understand what it will look or feel like to put a voice to words.
Our feelings get misunderstood and jumbled and we remain closed off from them because they feel foreign and new to us.
Those who have lived in difficult places or scenes cannot begin to believe when entering a season of healing that it won’t always feel ‘this way’.
A basket of words is a good tool to start when working with someone who is closed off and resistant.
Our group leaders were brilliant and caring and compassionate and wise, they were sensitive and gentle never pushing but always encouraging us to become stronger.
A basket of words is a good beginning
when the door to one’s heart and voice is closed.
Words that can bring life, hope, healing, and new awareness.
Words that challenge and re-direct our thoughts and minds.
Words that change the core of who we are and mature us into stronger people.
Words that change us deep within.
Restoring and Renewing our thoughts about life.
by Sharon O | Feb 21, 2014 | Uncategorized
The other day my husband was going through youtube and playing some of the old songs he knew I would recognize.
That is why my writings have gone down memory lane.
Stirring thoughts and feelings along with another writing I was already processing.
Isn’t it strange how a song can bring back so much emotion and feelings?
I think maybe that is why in the Psalms David used music to minister to his spirit.
God knew the music would stir and heal our hearts on many levels.
There is one more final writing about this topic.
About words.
About feelings.
About things hidden in our hearts.
One more to finish off this series of thoughts.
