by Sharon O | Feb 10, 2016 | Uncategorized
When my son was a little boy we went to a care home setting for his little class to sing to the seniors.
It was uncomfortable. I didn’t like it at all.
They were in wheelchairs, rocking chairs, some hung their heads downward, some smiled what seemed like faraway smiles, with empty darkened eyes when they looked at you.
The little kids didn’t seem scared or uncomfortable, but I was for sure.
I didn’t know what to think or how to react, if they grabbed me.
I wanted out of there as fast as I could get out. I was way out of my comfort zone.
Now that it’s been many years since then and we have been in the setting of care homes, assisted living homes and even foster home settings.
As I have learned to spend time with ‘relatives’ who live there, I was able to move from uncomfortable to, “I am ok with this.”
The elderly are one group of people who are very forgotten in our ‘current’ society. In the old days ma and pa lived with the kids like on the Walton show.
It was a group setting where they all shared meals, and home and relationships. It was very caring and loving and safe, and it was family.
This doesn’t happen anymore. Most older folk are now in care homes being cared for by others who ‘do it’ as a job not as a relationship.
I remember when my husbands dad went into a nice setting, he was fearful, we would put him in there and forget about him.
It is a valid fear. Many who live there are forgotten or rarely visited. Families do not make the time for the seniors.
It was not a valid worry for him, as his kids saw him all the time. Only when his memory became worse was it a problem because he wouldn’t remember who was there.
This could be a ‘think out of the box’ idea for Valentines day. Go visit a senior.
Take a bouquet of flowers to someone living alone, make some homemade cookies if they can have them.
Write a thank you note to the caregivers if you have any, and thank them for making your loved ones comfort level safe and nice.
Little things are so easy to do yet we avoid them. Because of our own comfort level.
I was very uncomfortable the first few times I went into a ‘senior care home.’ It was hard for me to imagine, what they used to do, before age took them away.
My sister lives in an assisted living home. It is safe and good for her to be there. It keeps her from harm and keeps her healthy.
I challenge you one more time, to do something new, different and kind as we head into the ‘Valentine’ weekend.
Perhaps it could even mean, write a note to your child’s teacher at school and say, “thank you,” for all you do all day long.
It is a time for what I call, ‘thinking out of the box’ and expressing thought and feelings, on this ‘day three’ of what we call ‘love week’.
by Sharon O | Feb 9, 2016 | Uncategorized
I had minor surgery today. Guess who showed up without telling me? yes my hubby.
That is what I am talking about, support without ‘feeling I must’, support because I want to.
I am recovering. The doctor did great I asked him to numb it before he numbed it and it worked wonderful.
I felt nothing other than a few ‘little’ pokes that didn’t hurt.
Tonight I am feeling the tugging and pulling of stitches. Tomorrow might be worse as the numbing drug wears off.
It should be good and heal well and we will know the results in a few days.
But this is what I am talking about. Without planning or discussing he showed up.
I was supported because he worried and cared, and he couldn’t find me when the doctor’s office ran later, and I should have been home when he called me.
Isn’t that better than a bouquet of roses that you would throw away after a few days?
YES it’s a constant ‘knowing,’ we care for each other.
I didn’t expect him to come to the doctor’s office and when the nurse came to the room and said, “your husband is here, do you want him in the room?”
It was a nice surprise. He even watched the doctor do the biopsy.
I would not do that for him…I am not a medical type person and he does not want me on the floor.
Do you have a way to surprise someone you love and care for?
The challenge continues, do something out of the ‘normal’ and create a surprise.
If you don’t have a husband, find a good friend, child or co-worker, everyone needs and appreciates
a ‘I care for you moment’.
by Sharon O | Feb 8, 2016 | Uncategorized
So this is the official LOVE WEEK.
Yes every Florist shop in town is busy this week creating beautiful bouquets, chocolate baskets, and gift items for the ‘love of your life.’
Pizza parlor’s are readying themselves for requests for heart shaped pizza’s. Groupon has been advertising for the ‘best place’ to take your loved one.
It is a week to celebrate. My preference as I have told my husband many times.
Don’t give me something on Valentines day just because Hallmark says you should, do it.
Give me something when I am least expecting it.
For example after my husband had a knee replacement surgery a year ago, I was running around in total exhaustion and worry and the door bell rang.
I opened the door up and there stood a delivery lady with a large vase of flowers. He had thought of me, when I needed a ‘lift’, and a bit of encouragement.
A beautiful bouquet with a nice little note. Now that was better than a Valentine gift because it was out of the blue and caught me by surprise.
Totally different from what you are expected to do, on days like Valentines day.
I didn’t expect a bouquet, in fact he was pretty dopey with the medications and the recovery I was very surprised he even thought about it.
What I am getting at is this.
Every day of the week, we have opportunity and choices to tell others how we feel about them.
We don’t need to wait for Valentine’s day or even other holidays.
It is more special when it is a heart felt ‘decision’ without a reason.
When you least expect it, not looking for it. Surprise.
So on this ‘love week’ I challenge you to do something different and unique.
Who knows… it might become a new tradition.
by Sharon O | Feb 5, 2016 | Uncategorized
Today’s word prompt is again an easy one for me to write about since it hits home with me on many levels.
The word for the day is: FOCUS
As we are heading into our retirement years and the months move quickly towards my husbands last day at work.
I am keeping busy cleaning and purging and revamping closets and clutter.
The other day I spent a few hours adding items to my Etsy store in hopes of decluttering a book case that has old antique books in it and assorted collectible items.
I am going through my closet and deciding, do I like it, love it or do I really need to keep it?
Since being retired about six years ago I have discovered the nice clothes I wore daily to work, are not being worn.
So I don’t really need to keep them right? They don’t need to take space in the closet anymore.
Also it is hard to FOCUS when as a writer, I have personal writing deadlines and then chores, and then cleaning and the list continues.
I have been helping our daughter keep her FOCUS on her home and job and kids and just life’s stresses when one is a single mom.
It is an every day thing, on going and although it is good, it is hard sometimes to stay on track.
As a couple we have to say, sometimes it is hard to FOCUS on what is ahead for us.
What we need to do as far as financial decisions, do we sell our home? do we get a motor home?
do we find a new car or keep what we already have? many decisions to be made.
Then to add all that together with staying in a direction where we FOCUS our goals together, it is challenging.
The meaning of FOCUS is to be clear and sharply defined, to direct one’s attention or efforts. To concentrate.
As we head into the next six months we will be moving more and more into a new direction.
To FOCUS our thoughts on what we need to do, how we need to do it, and when do we want this goal to be done.
We have talked about paying bills off, and planning a vacation of travel and sightseeing.
It takes a concentrated FOCUS to reach any goal.
That could mean retirement, or raising children, or exercising and getting healthy, going to college and getting a better job for ones future.
We all have had times in our lives when we must FOCUS on a plan and see it through to the end.
It takes effort, goal making, no distractions, and a mindset that we will FOCUS till it is done.
I like the word for the day. Let us FOCUS and do good and never let go of our goal.
by Sharon O | Jan 29, 2016 | Uncategorized
I saw the word prompt for today and it is what I have been learning to value for the last year or two.
Quiet. The word for the day is quiet.
I am in quiet most of the time, on some days I watch home shows on tv as I love to watch the buying and selling and remodeling ones.
It is fun to imagine the people who want to purchase a vacation home at a price of $1.1 million?
What is important to know and realize whether you live in a tiny house or a big house, it won’t solve the quiet inside your heart.
Peace comes from making peace deep within your heart and your spirit.
Quiet is a gift we give ourselves. It is breathing room for your soul.
Quiet allows us to listen to the whispers of the Lord.
He won’t shout. He won’t push. He won’t yell or intimidate. He whispers quietly and if we are too busy listening to the noise we will miss the gentle quiet lesson or words spoken.
Do I think He speaks to us, yes absolutely.
Have you ever stood at the beach and listened? the seagulls call is almost mournful as they fly over the roar of the loud ocean.
The waves sound in the rhythmic movements inward to the sand then out back to the depths of the ocean.
I stand mesmerized by the quiet and yet it is noise similar to a symphony. Each movement necessary.
I am by nature one who loves the quiet. I get very tired and very irritable with noise.
The years lately have taught me quiet is peace. Quiet is healing.
Psalm 119: [You’re my place of quiet retreat; I wait for your Word to renew me.]
Matthew 5:1-2 [When Jesus saw his ministry drawing huge crowds, he climbed a hillside. Those who were apprenticed to him, the committed, climbed with him.
Arriving at a quiet place, he sat down and taught his climbing companions.]
Matthew 6:6 [“Here’s what I want you to do: Find a quiet, secluded place so you won’t be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage.
The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense his grace.”]
Jesus knew we could not focus when there is other noise around us. The word quiet is used 114 times in the bible.
I think that should be something important for us to remember.
It is good to be in quiet. Colossians 3:12 [So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you:
compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline.] Do we get it yet?
Be quiet so we can have a teachable moment and listen.
by Sharon O | Jan 27, 2016 | Uncategorized
It’s hard to imagine us being retired. Soon my husband will be home, every day.
What will be our new normal? I don’t think too much will change for us. He will still get up early and I will sleep in.
He will still find time for some yard work till we find a home with no yard in a few years.
Our hope is to move to a new ‘place’ with less grass and maintenance.
We haven’t found that place yet but we are actively looking and being very selective where and when.
We want to find a ‘motor home’ for traveling in, so we can ‘decide in the morning’…let’s go to the beach.
It will be a new direction and freedom for us.
It will be good after all these years of working and getting mentally tired of the demands placed on him.
I have been home ‘retired’ for over six years and it has been a good place to be.
No the chore list has not been finished, yes it is easy to get distracted, no I have not gotten my purging and cleaning done.
In time it will be finished and then the new freedom of less will be our ‘breathing room’.
I am by nature a keeper and saver, he is a thrower so we will see what takes place in the months to come for us.
It will be a good nice challenge, I think.
I am sure there will be moments when we will be frustrated with each other.
Retirement will be a new direction for us and it will be good and positive.
It is time. We both feel it is very important to spend time together and enjoying the life we have while we have it.
There have been friends who worked long many years, then retire and in six months they pass away.
What a sad thing to experience. We are hoping that this ‘new’ era of our life will be rich and rewarding for us.
Many changes will take place, and many details must be taken care of and once that is all done.
We can relax as we explore new beaches and new scenes all around the area where we live, it will be good.
