Our Pastor has been teaching a series called soul sessions.
It has been thought provoking and interesting.
The question he asked last week was this:
What distortions do you have about God?

I had to stop and think about that question:
Always looking for the meanings of words I found these to match what he was asking from dictionary.com.
Distortion: a change in perception so that it does not correspond to reality.
The disguising of the meaning of unconscious thoughts so that they may appear
in consciousness as in dreams.
My answers to his question were these:
That He would not love me even though I know He does and
That He would leave me even though I know he won’t.
It is my belief that our distortions about God are based on our core beliefs about ourselves
from the world we grew up in. I believe those distortions are a reflection of what we experienced and perhaps were taught in a conscious way or an unconscious way.
The lessons we learned through other lessons given by those in authority.
(These are only my thoughts not verified by a professional in any way).
In my case: abandonment was a big issue when I was growing up.
The message that I was not important was loud and clear.
When a parent leaves it sends the message deep into the core
of the belief system of the child.
I know in my heart without a shadow of a doubt~
that God loves me…
but if I couldn’t be loved by my parent why would God want to.
I know in my heart without a shadow of a doubt~
that God will never leave me…
but I also know that because my own parent did…
it could be possible for God to do the same.
Now in saying all that without the intense meeting with God I had as a teenager…
the ability to doubt and to question would be much stronger.
(the story is here on this blog ~ march 21st entry)
God answered my prayer in such an intense way there was no choice but to believe.
There was no way I could not. The sureness of my new belief system was fortified
by the answer to my prayer. He knew I would need something so dramatic and so meaningful in order for me to believe in Him.
When the questions come… does God love me enough.
The word will tell me…”I have loved you with an everlasting love.”
When the questions come…will God leave me.
The word tells me… “I will never leave you or forsake you.”
Pastor said, “Love defines your relationship with God”…
if your parent didn’t love you enough is it possible to know God will?
Pastor also said, “Hope is found in your view of God…
the survival of your soul is dependent on your opinion of God in the moment.”
A crisis of Faith is a moment in time where you have to put your faith to the test.
For example when my mother in law found out she had terminal cancer she said, “well we will do the best we can and then leave it up to God.” She had a deep love for God so her soul was settled with the fact that she would see Him one day and it would be good. Because of her opinion of God and who He was she fought her cancer without becoming bitter or angry.
Her soul was settled and it had a profound effect on those who were with her throughout the process.
Pastor continued to talk about the survival techniques we learned growing up.
I could so relate to this since my own journey was full of hard and difficult places
my survival technique was to wall off anything or anyone to keep more hurt away.
Only when God touched me and met me through a prayer from my heart
could I truly believe and trust Him.
Soul sessions are all about discovering who we are as a person.
Our Pastor said, “Hope is always found in your view of God.”
I challenge you to explore the distorted thoughts and views you might have about Him.
Write them down and pray about them.
If you don’t know what they are ask Him to reveal them to you.
Then find scripture to counter balance your thoughts and beliefs.
Is a distorted view of who He is… hurting you in your relationship?
I pray we all search our hearts for what is holding us back from accepting a real relationship with a real and loving God.
Our hope is found in our view of God. I pray it be a positive one.